Skip to main content

Stop! Take the time to ask and listen!

This week I went through a new experience.  On August 1, a college roommate and a dear friend died.  August 1 I began my own journey in grief.  As I am sure you understand I have buried dozens of people as a pastor.  When it's someone who has predated your ministry, who loved you and you returned that love for as young men, its just different.  It effects you a whole different way.

Had the opportunity to connect with several others who fall into this category of friendship.  In my own moments of processing, I realized something.  I was given true gifts, in the friendships I made with these men.  I have never had the like again in 20 years.  Sure I have loved and been loved since then, but it was different.

These guys loved a man without a title.
These men loved a guy who's faults were large.
These men loved a guy they could have easily walked away from.
These men stuck through it - any and all of the events that forced others away.
I am forever in their debt.

Yet pondering over the scene of our friend who passed, I realized that while we all had a great love for each other, we had let life, jobs, family and other obligations get in the way.  We had let the distance and the time constraints cause us to miss the times of deep need that occurred.  We had put the obligation on the other person (s) instead of remembering that God had given us something special and that needed to continued to be nurtured and protected.

I am the chiefest of sinners in all of these things.  My friend went through at times some dark seasons, and I thought primarily of myself.  I didn't initiate calls.  I didn't pursue continuing the relationship.  I justified myself by saying if he needs me he will call me, and I was there when he did.

But looking back I wonder - should I have done more?

Here is my resolve.  To learn the lesson of this event.  If I never have the gift of another friendship like I have with these men, then these men will know that they have a good friend in me.  I will pursue.  I will connect.   I will love them in Christ.   I will ask and answer the hard questions.

The phrase says, "You don't know what you got until its gone."
My reply will be, "I'll treasure what I have right here"

2 "Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."  Gal 6:2


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

You Can Know.

26  For as the body apart from the spirit is dead, so also faith apart from works is dead" James 2:26 A common thought that has been shared with me is the insecurity some perceive in their Christian life.  Satan has a terrible ability to steer us away from the grace we have been freely given to the failures of our lives.  We often have hurt our relationship with Christ through those actions. So thankful for the grace of God.  It does not overlook sin, but it shows up when sin is present, with full hope of restoration through repentance.   Grace is not a license to sin, instead a tool used to redirect us back into fellowship and right standing.  Grace allows 2 major things to occur.  In the first sense it allows for the wrath of God to fall on the work of Jesus and not on us.  We call that propitiation.  The second thing that grace accomplished is the release of the Sprit to "guide us to all truth."  It is He who bring conviction and ultimately leads us to re

Killing Sin (part 3) - The Life Of Sin

This morning is the conclusion of a 4 part devotional series based upon the position that sin should have no place in the life of a believer. Sin compromises the spiritual walk thus sin must be put to death. These statements take a hard line, yet they are truth. The benefit of eradicating sin from your life is intimacy with God and power. The consequences of compromise with sin are impotence and complacency. It comes down to what kind of a Christian do you want to be. Do you want a faith that can move the mountains, or do you want a religious experience? The choice is yours. Let me encourage you to return to the previous 3 blogs on the topic. God is dealing with this man on the subject. May you benefit from my journey. Today we deal with the life of sin. What this means is that you did not practice abstinence with lust and you did not abort the fetus of sin as it developed (see part 2). What has been born now is controlling your life, demanding satisfaction every day. Just l

God's Justice

Most of us can probably talk about a level of injustice that they have personally witnessed.  You may have seen or been the victim of some type of abuse.  You may have seen people mistreated financially.  You may have known of cases where someone close to you was personally attacked by people whose sole purpose seemed to have been the outright destruction of character. They used every lie, slander and manipulation.  Their efforts may have even worked with others, peeling people away from truth. It's easy in those moments to ask the question, "Where was God in all of this?"  In some ways I think that every believer has a picture in their heads of Jesus riding a white steed into the battle and setting right the enemies of truth.  We want God to raise His mighty 'smiter' and do justice on our enemies in a timely and quick fashion that ends the suffering and sleepless nights that we experience.  We want this, yet it can be argued that this is often not the best co